Why Does Someone Self Harm?
Self harm is a coping mechanism.
People start to self harm for many different reasons. It is often a way of dealing with feelings and emotions that are too overwhelming to cope with. To many people it must seem so hard to understand how anyone could feel better by hurting themselves but often, the pain of trapped emotion on the inside is so painful, hurting yourself on the outside sort of puts your feelings back into balance.
Self harm can work in two ways when dealing with emotion. Sometimes it is like your feelings have completely switched off and you feel numb. Self harm kicks your feelings back in. Sometimes your feelings are so overwhelming, you feel like you will explode. Self harm calms these feelings down.
When you cause an injury to your body, chemicals are released which work in two ways. They reduce the pain you feel at the time and they calm you down so although self harm isn't the best way to deal with things, it actually works.
Unfortunately, those chemicals and the feeling it gives you is also addictive so before long, your body will start to crave it. In my case, what eventually happened was that the thing that had initially helped me stay in control of my emotions, was now part of my bigger problem and was ruining my life. I was totally reliant on self harm to get me through most situations.
Another reason people self harm is to punish themselves. This is often related to something that has happened in the persons life to make them feel so worthless. Unfortunately, again, this eventually escalates and you begin to loath yourself more and more.
Another reason is because it has become a habit. It is what you do in certain situations, it is just your way. You need to see the hurt on the outside so that you know the pain on the inside is real. Sometimes you even self harm just because you want to.
This is just the tip of the iceburg in explaining the reasons why people self harm and I will go into more detail in later posts.
Jane
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